Modern Knot Theory and the Origin of the Universe

Science has been abuzz with string theory, the concept that all matter ultimately consists of tiny strings that vibrate. But recent thinking has gone far beyond string theory into the revolutionary new view of the world “Modern Knot Theory,” which says the strings are actually tied into knots.

Being tied up in knots, was a concept first expressed by ancient Greek philosophers, who believed universe began as an original ball of twine which started unrolling. This amazingly advanced concept has been confirmed by modern science in what is called “The Big Ball Theory.” No one can adequately explain what started the ball rolling, although some scientists have hypothesized the existence of the Primal Cat. This is viewed as the Cat-aclysmic Theory of Creation.

Those who endorse this view say we can see evidence of the unraveling of the Big Knot, through greatly diminished bits of lint from galaxies billions of light year away as they foul up the Hubble Space telescope.

Knot theory has led to reformulation of quantum mechanics, particularly in the area of the Heisenberg Uncertainty Principle, to state that people who are uncertain about what they are talking about will continue to be uncertain for an indefinite period of time. The biggest problem with quantum physics continues to be that it’s almost impossible to get a quantum mechanic who does good work at a reasonable price. (The uncertainty principle states that it is impossible to know both the location and speed of a particle at a given point in time. The theory was suggested by Heisenberg’s wife who constantly complained that she didn’t know where her husband was most of the time. The other theory about the origin is that most of his colleagues believed Heisenberg uncertain of most things. He was constantly forgetting Avogadro’s number and whether it was unlisted or not.)

Under knot theory, different particles are expressions of how the strings are tied into knots. Those with a religious bent explain God as “The Great Boy Scout” who is constantly reshaping the knots in ways that are not compressible to humans.

However, knot theory faces the same questions as most other theories, particularly when it comes to of universe. Historically, there were those who believed that through entropy all energy would be exhausted and movement would come to a halt.

What happens when the ball is completely unwound is a subject of great controversy.

Cat-aclysm advocates feel the Primal Cat will tug on the string and will start it rewinding This process will be repeated as the universe is unwound and rewound in a continuous cycle. Others feel that when the ball is completely unwound, time and space will stop when the universe reaches the end of its rope and the cat gets bored.